by: Gelsey Brizo
While working fulltime and also being a full-time parent, it can be hard to balance work and your family life, let alone anything else. I don’t have any kids yet, but I still have my hands full with being a full-time student and working part-time. I can’t imagine the stress of parenting piled onto my already heavy load.
That’s why it astounds me, to this day, that my mother was able to get, not one, but two Masters Degrees (one in Management and the other in Marketing) while she was working full-time and raising both my little sister and me. What amazes me even more is that I never felt that she was absent from my life, not even once. I remember her attending all me school events, always being home for dinner, and always being there to take me out to play on the weekends. So how did she do it? How could she have possibly managed such a demanding workload without sacrificing the time she had to spend with her kids? Well, after speaking with my mom about how she juggled work, parenting and school, I came up with five tips that might help busy moms that want to pursue another degree but are having trouble figuring out how to fit it into their busy schedules.
1. Take it slow – Work at your own pace
My mom emphasized this a lot. Whatever program you enroll in, make sure that you can manage the workload or adjust it as you go, to ensure that you learn and actually pass the classes you take in the end. It’ll do you no good to overload yourself with too many courses because you’re in a rush to finish. If you do that, you might fail the course, lose money and miss out on really learning the material. As my mom would say, “They don’t put how long it took you to get the degree on your diploma,” so why rush? While working at her company, my mom alternated between taking one or two classes each semester, never any more because she knew it would be too much for her. Know your limits and don’t stretch yourself too thin. Just take your time, you’ll get there.
2. The internet is your best friend – Consider Online Degrees
To further work at your own pace, consider getting your degree online rather than physically having to attend classes at a University. It saves you a lot of time and energy that you can spend doing other things – such as being with your family. It also helps you build your own schedule by fitting class and study time into the times that are most convenient for you, instead of having to work around an established class schedule. My mom got her degrees from American International University’s (AIU) online Master’s program in the early 2000’s and she was easily able to chat with her teachers if she had any questions both through webcam and e-mail. Considering how far technology has come in only a few short years, it should be even easier, now, to communicate with teachers and view class recordings from the comfort of your own home. Some programs even have live sessions with teachers where you can actively participate in the class while the professor is lecturing. Online degrees make it easier on you to set your pace and fit everything into your schedule the way you want.
3. Establish a Routine
This is really important and goes hand-in-hand with pacing yourself. All classes have a syllabus in which all the assignments and due dates are posted. Use this to your advantage and plan accordingly. If you see there’s a lot due one week but a little due another week, distribute your workload evenly between those two weeks. It might be difficult to adjust to a new workload right away, but if you are consistent in your study routine and follow the goals you set for yourself, it’ll become much easier to balance everything. For example, my mom would always aim to finish up all her school-work before the weekend, so she could spend that time with us and not have to worry about homework. She would read on the bus on her way to work and at night when both my sister and I had already gone to sleep. She would have conferences with her teachers during her lunch breaks at work, or early in the morning before she had to wake us up from school. Little things like that helped her fit all her studying and homework into her weekly schedule and little by little it became the norm for her. If you have some spare time in your schedule, whatever that time may be, do something productive with it! The more you do during the week, the more time you get to spend relaxing and with your family on the weekend.
4. Give yourself a day off!
As I mentioned above, try to stay away from doing things on the weekends. My mom really stressed this point because sometimes she would only get three to four hours of sleep a night during the week and she used the weekends to relax and recharge. Her assignments were usually due on Sunday’s but she said doing it all by Friday really helped her because she was able to truly de-stress on the weekend, knowing she had nothing to worry about. Use that time to sleep and be with your kids. You’re not superhuman, if you spend your weeknights studying and your weekdays working, something is bound to give. But, if you really can’t give yourself the entire weekend off, at least give yourself one day off a week from thinking about school and work. Try to sleep in, though moms rarely get the chance to. Take your kids to the park or just outside to play. Eat with them, talk with them, and make sure you’re ready for the next week when you have to repeat the process all over again.
5. Always make time to attend school events – Be flexible
This is key to staying relevant in the lives of your children. If you’re going to take up this challenge and try to get a degree while working, never forget you still have to make time to be a part of your kid’s lives. Be flexible in your schedule. If you were planning to do an assignment on Wednesday night, but they have a game, try to do it earlier. Keeping your routine is important, but you also have to be able to adapt to change if necessary. I know time is scarce when you have so much to do, but you need to make time to be involved. Go to their school plays even if your kid is only villager number two, ask for a day off and go with them on one of their field trips. If they play a sport, try to make it to as many games as possible, especially if it’s a really important one. If they play an instrument, make sure you go to their concerts. Be there. Don’t just be there for dinner, although that’s important as well, make time for them even outside of your home. Take them to their friend’s birthday parties or take them and their friends out to play. Be the annoying mom that cheers when they make a goal or when they say their one line in the school play. You might embarrass them a little, but they’ll remember you being there and they’ll appreciate it. I can tell you from experience.
Additional Tip: Let your passion fuel you – Do what you love and don’t forget to be with the people you love
Finally, I wanted to add a little something extra. It’s not so much a tip as it is a word of encouragement. If you want to pursue a degree while having to balance all this other stuff, you are obviously passionate about whatever degree you are trying to acquire. Never forget that. Whether you are getting a degree to better yourself or your family or both, don’t give up if it’s something you truly want to accomplish. In being persistent and driven, you’ll not only achieve your goals, but you’ll also inspire your kids to work hard and never give up on something they really want, like my mom did for me. It’ll be hard and sometimes it’ll seem like you can’t do it, but remember – you can. As a mom, you’re already a role-model for your kids, but you can give them a little extra to look up to. If you work hard, they’ll notice and strive to do the same.
About the Author:
Gelsey Brizo. A senior at the University of Florida pursuing a degree in English. Born and raised in Miami, Florida she speaks both English and Spanish fluently and loves to watch and play soccer. A book fanatic who enjoys to read and write, she can’t go a day without a cup of coffee, a good read or her favorite music.